Seven veils (2023)

maybe I was wrong about her
was randomly talking about amanda seyfried like a week or two ago with my best friend and i said she feels miscast in every single role she’s done and that i dont understand where she fits into cinema

direct quote: “no one could ever make me like amanda seyfried.”

well, atom egoyan certainly tried his damn best.

so glad this finally made its way to theaters, and i hope to catch this once more before it leaves.

firebird (2021)

cold war boys
kgb. kinda gay, bro.

I waited over a year for this to be released in u.s. theaters.

pro: boney m.’s “rasputin”
con: the ‘four years later wig’
pro: they’re hot & they’re verse
con: this film was in english

the orgasm synced with the planes taking off was a bit on the nose.

i know what it’s like to be dead (1987)

complex phenomenon
“sexual arousal in humans is a complex phenomenon”

if you like the beatles, you’re gay. I don’t make the rules.

tw: reagan jumpscare

pleasure (2021)

pleasure pressure
do you realize how committed you have to be to just take those two dicks at the same time – let alone that third butt plug she ‘prepped’ with – for free?!

you couldn’t pay me enough.

i have neither the mental/emotional strength nor stamina it takes to be a porn star.

aside: i am ashamed at how many dudes in this film i not only recognized but could name.

[intense. check the trigger warnings beforehand and don’t watch this with your mom.]

the last showgirl (2024)

one good dinner scene
maybe i’m in a bad mood; maybe this movie is a mess – idk. you tell me. saw this with someone who gave it 5 stars so maybe i should just go fuck myself.

jamie lee curtis could never make me like her. i think the only person who can’t stand her more than me, though, is the wig maker for this film.

pamela was fine. loved seeing her lead something; it’s a shame it’s about an aged-out ‘star.’ that said, i wouldn’t make any more of this performance than what it was. outside of a couple of outstanding moments [the dinner scene, in particular – the dinner scene was worth the price of admission (yes, i did pay to watch this)], it largely felt like a rehearsal.

kiernan was grossly miscast.
billie…was there.
but, brenda? ate. the film would’ve gotten a fourth star if there was more of her in it.

the cinematography was ass. internally screamed, “stepped the fuck back!” at the cameraman during the entirety of the film.

this would’ve been an incredible short* film. the montage:runtime ratio was insane. if you gotta fill 1hr 29mins with that many unnecessary shots (why do i need to see pamela anderson standing in front of a chainlink fence?) your film might not have enough to say.

honestly? i’m sick of the coppola family (and all of its subsidiaries *cough*jason schwartzman*cough*. drain the swamp! take their hollywood cards away.


*the film is short – just under 90mins; but, this could’ve been a tight 40mins. and, it probably would’ve been better. the pacing is atrocious. there is no reason this should feel as long as it does for how short it is.